Afternoon Crumbs

Dear Adam Levine, please stop squeezing on Xtina like that before her tampon pops out again - ICYDK

There is a God and that God is obviously a theater queen, because he used his powers to get Taylor Swift knocked out of the Les Miserables movie - Lainey Gossip

Her mother whipping her way to a tragic mid-life crisis is not keeping Tater Head from the stroll - The Superficial

If Emma Roberts keeps us this bitchy beard reputation, her career as a beard in Hollywood will be ovah! - Celebitchy

Ashton Kutcher's side ho can now write "nip slipper" on her 2012 tax return next to occupation - (NSFW) Drunken Stepfather

Kate Upton as ScarJo as Marilyn Monroe - Hollywood Tuna

And not once did The Silver Fox tell Madge to shut her loud leather dominatrix secretary outfit - Towleroad

Matthew Gray Gubler, if that's what you need today - The Berry

Oh you know, it's just Charlize Theron in a monokini, blocking hos from turning left - Popoholic

Raven's signature chewed up brows are going to Broadway - Just Jared

The story here is Joe Jonas trying out a new beard, but my mind is wandering to the image of his brows chewing on Raven's brows - Celebslam

Viggo Mortensen's body is ready for Michael Assbender - Popsugar

Would you judge me if I told you that I blew up each one of these pictures and sat on them all? - Cityrag

Aren't there other bottom shelf trollops the paparazzi could've wasted their clicks on? - I'm Not Obsessed

I do love a dude who can teabag me while we're both standing - The Daily What

I think I had a dream about this once - Videogum