Kristen Stewart has been in the news a lot lately, but less so for her movies. But the latest international trailer for On the Road is out, so perhaps a small diversion is due. The film is the first real attempt to bring Jack Kerouac’s legendary novel of the same title to screen, over 30 years after Francis Ford Coppola bought the rights to the book. Walter Salles directs the film, which had its world premiere at the Cannes Film Festival in May. On the Road stars Stewart, Garrett Hedlund, Kirsten Dunst and Sam Riley.
The film features Riley (ControL) as Sal, who falls under the spell of the intoxicatingly charming Dean Moriarty (Hedlund), who himself chases around America for freedom and an elusive “It.” Standing in as surrogates for Kerouac and Beat poet Neal Cassady, respectively, Sal and Dean travel around the country indulging in drink, drugs, sex, fast driving and the whims of youth hellbent on not conforming to post-WWII America.
“I like pushing and watching a genuine experience on screen,” Stewart said in Cannes. “The reason I wanted to do the job was to be provoked as much as possible and then to do it and take it further. We were just going forth, and as long as you’re being honest there’s nothing to be ashamed of.”
Following Rush Limbaugh’s attempt to cry conspiracy over the idea that The Dark Knight Rises villain Bane was meant as a political jab at Mitt Romney’s ties to Bain Capital, comic book writer Chuck Dixon — who created the Bane character for DC’s 1993 series Knightfall — chimed in to set the record straight on the character’s origins. “Bane was created by me and Graham Nolan and we are lifelong conservatives and as far from left-wing mouthpieces as you are likely to find in comics,” he told ComicBook.com. “He’s far more akin to an Occupy Wall Street type if you’re looking to cast him politically. And if there ever was a Bruce Wayne running for the White House it would have to be Romney.” [ComicBook.com via The Guardian]
Another Oscars promo video, another vain attempt to show some personality and pep by the Academy; this time around the Oscars have tapped Mike Myers to do an uppity butler type straight out of the discards of the Austin Powers supporting character brainstorming boards, who teaches Oscar winner Kevin Kline the proper way to hold his statuette. If this kind of humor tickles you silly and makes you set your TV calendar for Sunday, then hold on to your pants and chill a few cans of Ensure!
We are in for a riot, people. I mean, what says hilarious and relevant more than KEVIN KLINE and MIKE MYERS??
Sigh. It’s not even funny to joke about how unfunny these bits are. I refuse to believe this is really the best that Funny or Die could do with the Oscars. Given the choice, I vote “Die.”
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Somewhere in Europe, tucked in the corner of a cool, dark cellar is a hidden chamber which contains a horrible secret. A man has been cryogenically frozen. His mind, balls and sperm have been forcibly removed and are stored nearby. Meanwhile, his soulless doppleganger travels the globe with a skeletal vampire and her child army. – City Barbie
Runners-up:
In an attempt to re-capture the innocence of those days when he could walk around unnoticed by fans and the paparazzi, Brad Pitt channels his inner Seth Green. – phungi
Brad’s first attempt to morph into James Haven goes awry when he turns into James Hetfield instead. – Pookie
What you don’t see is the horde of oncoming beanie babies smelling like abandonment and Lolavie. – Ms.Fit
Click here if you can’t see the video above and click here for more from The NY Times’ Touch of Evil series
Papa Joe’s attempt to whore out his unborn grandchild in a pregnancy announcement spread in a weekly tabloid for half a million dollars is failing harder than his attempt to convince Jessica Simpson that he’s a board-certified pregnant tits masseuse. The first thorn in his plan was shoved in by OK! Magazine whose cover this week makes it look like Jessica opened up her mouth and told them personally that she’s farting for two nowadays (but the “confirmation” comes from some unnamed source). The second thorn in Papa Joe’s plan was shoved in by Jessica herself when she strut through JFK yesterday with a Spanx tank top full of FETUS!!!!
There goes that $500,000…..
Jessica’s knocked the hell up state is about as obvious as the fact that Ashlee Simpson looks like Pete Doherty trying to shapeshift into Owen Wilson. Either Jessica’s womb is full of Arby’s future customer of the year, or a toddler got a little barbecue sauce on his leg during a family reunion and she sort of kind of ate him whole. They’re just waiting for the toddler to pass through Jessica’s digestive system before falling out the other end. Now that is an announcement worth $500,00!
Annette Bening will play Kristen Wiig’s mother in Imogene, the tale of “a moderately successful Gotham playwright (Wiig) who stages a fake suicide attempt to win back her ex-boyfriend, only to end up forced into the custody of her gambling-addict mother.” I hope this means the return of the shifty, savvy Bening we saw in The Grifters. I assume Kristen Wiig has a mean Anjelica Huston impersonation in her arsenal. In the meantime, Bening is working on He Loves Me with Paul Dano and Zoe Kazan. Oscar, please! [Deadline]
· It looks as though the Force is strong with documentary filmmakers Heidi Burkey and Tim Larson. The pair followed students from the Arts & Learning Children’s Conservatory in Anaheim, Calif. over the course of a year, during which the kids put on a musical version of The Empire Strikes Back. The film is shot, and thanks to some generous donations through Kickstarter, Burkey and Larson will actually have a chance to finish the thing. Click through to watch the trailer, then stick around for more Buzz Break.
[via PopCandy]
· Rob Lowe — who is busy being awesome on Parks & Recreation — will star in the political drama Knife Fight. [Deadline]
· Tim Robbins and Mark Ruffalo will team up to star in Thanks for Sharing, the directorial debut of The Kids Are All Right screenwriter Stuart Blumberg. Sharing will follow the lives of recovering sex addicts in New York. [THR/Risky Business]
· FilmDistrict has purchased the U.S. distribution rights to Playing the Field with Gerard Butler. Catherine Zeta-Jones, Uma Thurman, Jessica Biel and Judy Greer co-star. [Deadline]
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