One of the more mysterious curios of the fall movie season is Angelina Jolie’s directorial debut In the Land of Blood and Honey. In an interview with Vanity Fair (on newsstands in New York and Los Angeles this week), Jolie says that she wrote the script for the Bosnian War-set romance while she was ill and quarantined from her children. “I don’t watch TV and I wasn’t reading anything. So I started writing. I went from the beginning to the end. I didn’t know any other way.” Afterward, she passed the draft to Brad Pitt; what did her super-famous husband think? “He called and said, ‘You know, honey, it’s not that bad.’” Oh. Maybe leave that one off the poster. [VF.com]
Stephen King lied to us all. Annie Wilkes from Misery didn’t die when Paul bashed her in the head with that pig statue. No, Annie Wilkes lived, retreated back into her cabin and later traded her crazed obsession with Misery Chastain for a crazed obsession with a show called True Blood.
Then Annie pawned off of a few of her ceramic penguins to pay for a plane ticket to the True Blood premiere after-party in L.A. Just look at Annie lurking in the background while the object of her affection ASkars laughs at Amanda Seyfried who is begging him to pull out his Swedish sausage (Who can blame the trick?). Looking at this makes me feel like I’m lying on an iron bed with a piece of wood between my ankles.
And then just look at Annie dissecting Amanda with her eyes like she can’t wait to make a skin suit out of that girl so that ASkars will hover his hand around her face too.
Dear ASkars, if “Amanda Seyfried” comes up to you with a needy face and says “Touch me, you dirty birdy, you,” RUUUUUUN!
West Goshen Police Chief Michael Carroll announced today that Jackasses’ Ryan Dunn had a blood alcohol level of 0.196% when he crashed his Porsche into a tree, killing himself and his friend Zachary Hartwell. Police Cheif Carroll also said that Ryan was going anywhere from 132-140mph before the crash. That tension you feel in the air is Roger Ebert’s hand hovering over his keyboard while he thinks about typing out the characters I-T-O-L-D-Y-O-U-S-O. The details from CNN:
“The initial crash reconstruction investigation determined that Mr. Dunn’s vehicle was traveling between 132-140 mph at the time of the collision,” West Goshen Police Chief Michael Carroll said in a statement Wednesday.
Toxicology testing by the coroner indicated Dunn’s blood alcohol concentration was 0.196%, which is more than twice the legal state limit of 0.08, Carroll said.
Everything (and I mean fucking everything) has already been said. The lesson here is, if you’re drunk enough to bleed Blood Marys, then it’s probably not a good idea to hit the gas pedal on your Porsche until it touches 140 on the odometer. Take a pedicab! Or a shopping cart! Actually, don’t take a shopping cart.
By the way, when my mom saw this story on the news, the first thing she said was, “SAD! But I like that dog he carried around in that movie with Iron Man.” Your mom probably said the same thing.
Can True Blood’s Ryan Kwanten Save the Superhero Genre in Griff the Invisible?
By admin on June 23, 2011
Usually I’d support Ryan Kwanten in any effort he made to wear novelty costumes, but when it comes to superhero togs, I have to think twice. Can we tolerate another caped crusader — let alone enjoy one — after Green Lantern? In Griff the Invisible, Kwanten plays a wannabe comic hero stuck in the real world, and I’m sure we’ll learn all about how he’s heroic nonetheless. Is it enough of a twist on the familiar tale to warrant a viewing? Trailer and poster follow.
Frankly, yes, there’s a weird enough protagonist here who gives me some hope for an unusual, if cloying story. The lack of emerald anything feels like a godsend right now. But here’s why the optimism fades: The badinage between our woeful romantics (“I live in a bubble that no one gets into but you. Griff, will you get into my bubble?”) is too bubbly, the Aspergian jolts that ring across Kwanten’s face seem contrived, and there’s a distinct chance this’ll be a much-lesser Kick-Ass or Super or whatever other pseudo-hero stories exist. Poster’s cute, though.
Griff the Invisible hits select theaters August 19. It’s already out in Australia.
Verdict: On the bubble.
[via Apple]
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