Stan Lee (90)
David Archuleta (22)
Mackenzie Rosman (23)
Thomas Dekker (25)
Sienna Miller (31)
Noomi Rapace (33)
John Legend (34)
Vanessa Ferlito (35)
Seth Meyers (39)
Malcolm Gets (48)
Joe Diffie (54)
Denzel Washington (58)
Gayle King (58)
Don Francisco (72)
Dame Maggie Smith (78)
Nichelle Nichols (80)
Annapolis Naval Academy’s annual race up the lard monument is the most beautiful, peentastic, phallic and patriotic thing I’ve ever seen! USA! USA! – Buzzfeed
Keira Knightley is engaged and I’m wondering if her soon-to-be husband has told her that he’s the broken condom baby of David Archuleta and Perez Hilton - Lainey Gossip
Kanye West’s movie sounds exactly like what his colonoscopy would look like – The Superficial
Food Network’s Anne Burrell says “DUH” to the news that she’s a gayelle – Towleroad
What in black and blue lattice crust hell is Kate Upton wearing? – Hollywood Tuna
More like a “titty-off” – (site NSFW) Drunken Stepfather
TGISF – The Berry
Lisa Marie Presley ain’t lying, because I’m sure her soul is in a mason jar on Xenu’s shelf – Celebitchy
Clive Owen has never put the tingles in me, but for some reason his “70s retired police detective” look is – Just Jared
I see four saggy boobs: Kim, her tits and Kanye – ICYDK
Katy Perry is really taking this 90s goth look seriously – Popoholic
Tom Sturridge should not be puckering when he’s got that tragic display on his head – Popsugar
The Silver Fox slaps down another – SOW
Chace Crawford is moist – SOW
Brit Brit is special - Hollywood Rag
Nicole Kidman totally injects Botox into her nalgas – Cityrag
Six had a baby, didn’t name her Seven – I’m Not Obsessed
David Archuleta, the 19-year-old Monchhichi fetus who almost won American Idol, tells Singapore’s XIN MSN that he’s never ever been kissed on the mouth. Two things. #1: Maybe he’s never had the chance to put his mouth on another because his creepy father is always stuck on him like crabs on a Hilton. #2: Maybe he subscribes to Vivian Ward’s rule that you can do everything but kiss on the mouth. You know, maybe he’s a major pig slut who has done everything from scrambling internal organs with a dildo to shit that involves shaved gerbils slathered in generic Crisco (don’t visualize those things or the Monchhichi Protective Services might knock on your door). Who knows, but I do know that Michael Vartan needs to get on the case!
via Wow Report
David Archuleta, the always out of breath overgrown fetus from American Idol, was on The Wendy Williams show today and he made the mistake many of us have made a dozen times before: he thought Steven Tyler was a beautiful lady with luscious hair and succulent lips. David tried to play that shit off even though Wendy called him out on it.
And you know Wendy was thinking to herself that she wishes she had Steven Tyler’s problems. Why doesn’t anybody ever mistake her for a woman?!
via ONTD
