Yes, Mara Jade, it’s possible for Harrison Ford to be “open to the idea” of reprising his role as Han Solo in Disney’s Star Wars Episode VII and still hate the character, as Movieline noted back in 2010. The key here is that the actor may finally get the opportunity to kill off the character that has bedeviled him throughout his auspicious career, which is something he wanted back in Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi.
A “highly placed source” told EW.com that “Harrison is open to the idea of doing the movie and he’s upbeat about it,” but the story also notes, “don’t be surprised if his contract includes a mandatory death scene for the sly old space smuggler.”
Now, there’s a reason to be upbeat! Ford gets to chew some scenery in a death scene and cut his ties — symbolically, psychically, joyously — to the role he can’t seem to shake, or love.
Even though, two of the video clips seemed to have suddenly been pulled from Movieline’s 2010 post, Ford’s not-so-fond feelings for the space cowboy character that made him a box-office boss have been pretty apparent over the years. As EW also reported, Ford said in a 2010 ABC interview that Han Solo “was not so interesting to me” and that “I thought he should have died in [Episode VI] to give it some bottom.”
I also would have much preferred a Solo death scene instead of watching Ewoks dance. So, I hope Ford gets his wish. Then, the next time a talk-show host asks him about his iconic role, he can finally say: ”Han Solo — he dead.”
Related Stories: Harrison Ford’s Long History of Hating…
Full Story »Prometheus writer Damon Lindelof may not be writing Star Wars Episode VII, but he can still suggest plot points. On Thursday, FirstShowing.net debunked some pretty rampant and persistent speculation that 1952, the science-fiction project that Lindelof and Brad Bird are writing for the new owner of LucasFilm, Disney, was the code name for a new Star Wars trilogy. But just two days earlier, when rumors were still making the rounds, Lindelof took to his Twitter feed to suggest some Episode VII ideas that were better suited to a Robot Chicken Star Wars special. 
“Chewbacca’s great-great grandson is named Drewbacca and he must overcome his allergies to lasers and meat,” wrote in one Tweet, which sounds just a tad more entertaining than the plot to the Star Wars Holiday Special.
In another, he suggested: “Yoda’s Ghost gets annoyed by Obi-Wan’s Ghost (too much whining) and they fight with Ghostsabers.”
Lindelof posted both with the hashtag “#IdeasForEpisodeVII”
On Thursday, he also alluded to reaction over his rumored involvement in the new Star Wars trilogy. Linking to a post by Ain’t It Cool News, Lindelof tweeted: “If I ever need a suicide note, I’ll just print out this comments section,” in which he gets a bit of a thrashing. Wrote one commenter: “Keep fucking Damon Lindelof away from this!”
In other Star Wars News, whatever you think about George Lucas’ decision to sell LucasFilm to Disney, it’s hard to take issue with his announcement that he’ll be giving a chunk of the $4 billion sale of his company to a foundation supporting education.
“For 41 years, the majority of my time and money has been put into…
Full Story »May the farce be with you! In the wake of news that Disney will be producing more Star Wars movies as a result of its acquisition of George Lucas’ LucasFilm on Tuesday, the geniuses at Conan O’Brien’s Team Coco have posted some very funny parody posters of what the interstellar franchise will look like under the influence of the House of Mouse.
I’m partial to the Boba Fett-meets-Buzz-Lightyear hybrid, but the image of the Jawas taking over for the Seven Dwarfs and spiriting off a comatose Snow White is a keeper, too. The full Boba poster and a third featuring the characters from Peter Pan silhouetted against the Death Star can be found at the Team Coco website. There’s such great material for satire here that I have a feeling that this is just the beginning. Walt Disney as Darth Sidious, anyone?
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South Park is either getting seriously meta, or bizarrely free-associative in its advanced age. The beginning of Wednesday night’s new episode of the Comedy Central series saw the relentlessly cheerful and naively optimistic character Butters Stotch become a pint-sized rageaholic that is initially attributed to his Hawaiian roots, but later turns out to be about the charmed life of Ben Affleck. 
After arriving on the island of Kaua’i to engage in a rite of passage that, presumably, will cure him of the furies, Butters inexplicably vents about Affleck, wondering how after the mediocrity of Daredevil, the actor/director “can hit a home run that everyone loves,” a reference to Affleck’s critically well-received Argo.
“You shouldn’t be able to be good looking, and be with Jennifer Lopez and be a good director,” Butters wails “Argo is a good movie! It holds up! Ben Affleck has everything, Braaaaa!” (Affleck and Lopez were featured in a famous 2003 South Park episode called “Fat Butt and Pancake Head.”
At one point, Butters summons up enough rage to sink a cruise ship with a golf ball. His battle cry: “Stupid Ben Affleck!”
The cure for his vexation: Jennifer Garner. Butters cools his jets when someone points out that Affleck is no longer with JLo and is now married to Garner.
“He’s just married to Jennifer Garner? Oh my gosh, I feel so much better!” Butters says, setting up one of the most creative insults I’ve heard on South Park. ”Ben Affleck has a lot going for him,” Butters says as he walks off into the Hawaiian sunset with Kenny. “Not everything, but a lot.”
Maybe I’m reading too much into this plot point, but I wonder if creators Trey Parker…
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While some of us were lighting sparklers from our b-holes to celebrate The Silver Fox casually giving up his spot in the glass closet, that Aqualish-looking ass bitch Star Jones said on Today that she thinks he completely choreographed his coming out for maximum attention and to pull up the ratings of his talk show. On today’s episode of Anderson, the Rhoda to Anderson’s Mary, Andy Cohen, brought up his coming out, and the Silver Fox said that the only thing that tore a strip of silver leaf off of his fox hole was what Star said. Anderson stuffed some dried bitchiness into a tea bag, dropped that tea bag in a mug full of lukewarm tap water and then served it to Star Jones:
“I will say and I actually haven’t mentioned this, the only thing that did kind of annoy me and actually it annoyed my mom who brought it up to me, Star Jones of all people, I know you mentioned it on your show. Star Jones of all people, I haven’t thought about Star Jones in I don’t know how long. I was unaware she was even on TV still but she apparently shows up on a morning show on Today or Good Morning America, The Today Show. Anyway, out of the blue Star Jones said after I sent this email Star Jones said this was a ratings ploy by me to boost ratings.”
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Full Story »“James Cameron is who James Cameron is because James Cameron does what James Cameron does.” At least I think that’s what James Cameron’s doppelganger said on Wednesday night’s new episode of South Park after diving into the depths to “raise the bar” and save the world from Honey Boo Boo and fat people who terrorize the world on motorized scooters.
While President Obama debated Mitt Romney on the networks, Michelle Obama made a cameo appearance in a wonderfully meta episode of the Comedy Central series in which the Avatar, Titanic and Terminator director — who last spring dived to the bottom of the deepest place on earth, the Marianas Trench in the Pacific Ocean — took it upon himself to save the world from the cultural nadir established by Honey Boo Boo (whose consumption of “sketti and butter” and other craptastic food necessitates her being fitted with a pig’s heart in the episode).
For those who listen to NPR and still read the New York Times, Honey Boo Boo is the nickname of ultra-zaftig child beauty pageant oddity Alana Thompson, who has her own show on TLC, which, believe it or not, stands for The Learning Channel. As South Park creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone indicated in Wednesday night’s episode, Honey Boo Boo’s emergence in the culture has lowered the bar even farther than President Bill Clinton’s oral sexcapades with Monica Lewinsky.
The good news is that after Cameron saves the dignity of our culture, he instructs the crew of Team Cameron to “Set a course for the set of Avatar 2!” Now that’s what we call N’avi-gation! (Ba-dum-bump!)
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A million years ago I walked into the bathroom of some goth club in L.A. and listened to (and saw) some drunk, stumbling mess in the first stall get the barfs from the butt and miss the toilet. I thought that was the most disgusting shit (punned on purpose) to ever happen in a club bathroom, but that mess was nothing compared to what happened in the bathroom of the NYC nightclub Griffin on Tuesday morning. Both Page Six and the NYDN say that in the bathroom of the Griffin, RiRi and Chris Brown got physical, only this time she didn’t end up in the emergency room.
Some witness tells Page Six that RiRi showed up to the club after Fist Brown did and sat at a table near his. Fist Brown made his way to RiRi’s table, lifted up his shirt and the two started freaking on each other and mouth fucking. You’d think that the bathroom would already be occupied by people barfing their souls out from watching those stupid bitches get gross on each other, but it wasn’t, because RiRi and Fist Brown went in there together. When they came out of the bathroom, the witness says RiRi looked a little “ruffled.” Fist Brown and his entourage of dick bags left at around 4 in the morning
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The epically awkward, debauched Danish sitcom Klovn, wich is soon coming to the United States as the epically awkward, debauched Danish feature-length comedy Klown, currently has restored an episode online written by the epically awkward, debauched Danish filmmaker Lars von Trier. What could go wrong? So much, actually. Have a look and find out.
Revived from the series’ second season by the movie’s US distributor Drafthouse Films, the episode (titled “It’s a Jungle Down There”) finds the notorious Frank and Casper “taking interest in a masturbation class and their persistent infiltration of these very private sessions.” It seems safe enough for work, I guess, unless everyone at your work speaks Danish, in which case rally them ’round and kick off early! What the hell, we’re technically passed the midweek point by now. It might as well be Friday.
Klown debuts July 27 in limited theatrical release as well as on VOD and digitally.
