Halle Berry already fucked up her ankle while shooting the movie The Hive with Abigail Breslin (seen below looking like a lost Fanning sister) and last night she suffered a BOOM to the head while shooting that same shit in L.A. That shit is cursed! That movie sounded like a bad idea as soon as it was announced that Punk from I Love New York 2 joined the cast.
TMZ says that while shooting a fight scene, Halle fell and hit her head on a concrete block. Since head injuries are some serious shit, an ambulance was called and Halle was shuffled off to Cedars at around 10pm. The doctors ran a few tests, did an x-ray and declared her to be “okay” after they looked inside her head and saw banners with the words “Fuck you, Gabriel! Fuck you in your pretty face!” flying around. Halle’s rep tells People that she’s been released and won’t take a sick day:
“Halle Berry suffered a minor head injury while shooting a fight sequence on the set of her film, The Hive. She was taken to the hospital as a precaution, but she checked out healthy and was released. She’ll continue production as planned.”
And just before the accident, in a hotel room in Manhattan somewhere, a half-nekkid Gabriel Aubrey slipped on the rest of his clothes while saying, “Okay, Tommy, I did it, now can you, the all-magical wizard priestess of the alien bridges, use your telekinesis powers like you promised? Oh, and can you also glamour the last 10 minutes from my mind or do I have to call up ASkars for that?”
In a court room in L.A. yesterday, a judge watched as two pretty faces slowly contorted into every layer of crazy as Gabriel Aubrey and Halle Berryberrycrazee tried to turn down their own insanity while discussing the custody of their daughter Nahla. A hearing was called last week after Nahla’s nanny accused Gabriel of pushing her during an argument. Halle asked the court to temporarily take away Gabriel’s visitation rights until the whole “nanny beating” thing cleared up. The judge didn’t do that, but after a long ass meditation hearing, they all agreed to do the following:
- Gabriel will go to anger management classes where he’ll learn that every time he feels like he wants to rage at a trick, he needs to stop, drop his panties and roll on over to the nearest webcam to give all of us a show.
- Halle will continue her own therapy sessions, or she’ll be framed for Gabriel’s death and will be forced to spend the rest of her life in an insane asylum with an ugly-fied Penelope Cruz in a jacked up wig.
- Halle and Gabriel will regularly meet with a third party to calmly talk about how they should raise their child. The third party will be given one of those Hunger Games suicide pills just in case their sanity can’t take facing a two-headed beast of lunacy.
- 3-year-old Nahla
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