It’s always a sad day when a member of the Sisterhood of the Traveling Forehead Vein goes after a fellow member.
In 2010, Jennifer Aniston’s partner in boozing Chelsea Handler said this about Angie Jolie during her stand-up act in New Jersey: “She’s a home wrecker, she is. She can rescue as many babies from as many countries as she wants to. I don’t fucking believe you. She gives interviews, ‘I don’t have a lot of female friends.’ Cause you’re a fucking cunt … you’re a fucking bitch.”
In the same year, Chelsea said this about Angie Jolie during an interview with Katie Couric for Glamour: “Yeah, I’m not a fan hers. She just doesn’t come off to me as a sincere woman. She seems like a woman that you’d really want to avoid. [Jennifer Aniston] makes me laugh. She’s irreverent and hilarious, and she sends me really, really funny e-mails.”
In 2012, Chelsea Handler said this about Angie Jolie when More asked her what her idea of a non-girl’s girl is: “Probably Angelina Jolie . . . She [Jolie] doesn’t strike me as someone I would have a close friendship with.”
And on Watch What Happens Live last night, Chelsea kept stabbing at Angie’s forehead vein with her own forehead vein when she said this to Andy Cohen:
“She seems like a demon. It has nothing
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There have been many false reports about this actress in the past… but this time she really is pregnant!
She is not married to her Significant Other – and we are assuming that he is the baby’s father – so the couple will need to make a decision in the next few weeks. Since she is over the age of 30 and loves children, her friends believe that she will opt to keep the baby. We have heard that her S.O. is not especially eager to get married, so she may be going the single-parent route for now.
She is only approximately five weeks along, so there is nothing to see yet. But, with summer right around the corner, it will be difficult our actress to cover up the pregnancy once she does start showing. Given how slim she is, we expect that you’ll start to see a bump sooner rather than later, perhaps as early as the middle of June. Oh, and although it is too early to know the gender of the baby either, we predict that the couple will opt for a European-sounding name. (Blind Gossip)
This is obviously about Jennifer Aniston since every other damn week a different tabloid says a fetus has checked into her baby-growing bag, but why would she go with a European-sounding name? Because Jennifer is Greek and Justin Theroux’s name is French. (Note: I’m pretty
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Over two weeks ago, Jennifer Aniston was planning a wedding, then she had a case of the babies and now hos are saying that she’s about to renew her membership to the Forever Alone Society. Star Magazine (via Hollywood Life) says that when Justin Theroux sits at the breakfast table in Jennifer’s Bel Air mansion, he softly sings “fuuuuuuuuuck myyyyyyyy liiiiiiiiiiife” to himself as she sticks one of those Plum pouches in the mouth of her Baby Alive. Some source says that when Justin is lying in bed next to Jennifer, while she’s clutching a Beanie Baby monitor, the dream bubble in his head is filling up with pictures from his past life. Justin wants to back to NYC and he wants to go back to his ex-piece Heidi Bivens. So says the source:
“The bloom is off the rose. He wants his old home, his old love and his old life back. Justin and Heidi still talk, and they are very supportive of each other. Justin feels she’s handled herself with grace, never becoming nasty or vindictive though it was a total shock when he began seeing Jen behind her back while they were still living together. Justin is full of remorse and regret which he has told Heidi. Justin wants a family, but he doesn’t want it with Jen.”
And then Star’s editor
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One of the longest running jokes (besides me somehow making a full-time living off of blogging for the past 5 years) is that Jennifer Aniston keeps a delivery gown in her closet and every Thursday afternoon she goes to the nursery of a local hospital to coo and aww at one of the newborns like she’s its mother. What I’m saying is that Jennifer Aniston has long been painted as a pathetic and chronic baby-wanter, but she tells CBS This Morning (via SS) that everybody but her is obsessed with what is happening in her womb. Jennifer says that she doesn’t need to take a whiff of diarrhea fumes from her newborn kid to feel satisfied:
“That doesn’t measure the level of my happiness or my success in my life, in my achievements, in any of that. I feel like I’m 30. I honestly didn’t start to feel my best until was in my 30s. Physically, I started eating better and taking better care of my body, in terms of being physical and exercise.”
Jennifer Aniston couldn’t be more right. Babies don’t equal happiness. What really equals happiness is a backyard pool full of Grey Goose (which Aniston has), a supple coat of many leathers (which Aniston has, it’s called her skin) and zillions of dollars from playing herself in shit movie after shit movie. But the best thing Aniston has is a nursery
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