Fairy tales really do come true… when Hollywood is out of other ideas. EW has the first look at Tommy Wirkola’s Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters, a film starring Jeremy Renner and Gemma Arterton as grown versions of the Grimm trekkers who once killed a witch during their youth. Apparently the movie takes on a gritty Pulp Fiction vibe while invoking the very real bonds between siblings who’ve suffered abuse and trauma. Bread crumbs and broken lives, y’all. Click through for a first glimpse.
Well, look at these little Sci-Fi Network adventurers from 1997! They could follow Stargate SG1 for at least three seasons. Does the ultramarine battle attire read as a little ridiculous to anyone? It’s like the action-adventurer version of denim-on-denim. I want to see costumes out of a kaleidoscopic, futuristic, strudel-centric world, not a rejected wardrobe suggestion for Mortal Kombat: Annihilation.
Yes, I’m cynical during this onslaught of fairytale media, but I’m just having trouble grasping the allure of simple stories retold as flashy capers. Remember Red Riding Hood? Shudder. If Charlize Theron’s not spewing rancor, I don’t see the point in revisiting olde tales. That said, I hope Hansel and Gretel stumble upon their old captor sipping a gingerbread latte at Starbucks. Go for kitsch, Gemma! Kitsch!
Hansel & GreteL: Witch Hunters arrives March 2.
‘Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters’ First Look [EW]
Full Story »Did you know that all movies based on video games are five-star landmarks of cinema? I did the research and it’s true. No use double-checking my work: Double Dragon, Resident Evil, Super Mario Bros. (Happy birthday, Samantha Mathis!), Mortal Kombat, Mortal Kombat: Annihilation, Mortal Kombat: Back in the Habit, and the coup de grace, Street Fighter all qualify as gems. Another one is about to join their company: the completely ignored Tekken film. Let’s observe this fresh nugget of DVD-bound Namco gold!
Here are all the familiar characters in action. Looks about right. Anna and Nina should refer to themselves as “the original Williams sisters” and conduct a photoshoot where they kick ass on a clay court.
Tekken arrives on DVD and Blu-Ray July 19.
⢠‘Tekken’ Movie Coming to DVD [Cinema Blend]
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