In “bitches staying messy” news, Bobby Brown was pulled over by the police today in Reseda, CA, because he’s Bobby Brown so they knew he must be up to some backwards shit. No, they pulled Bobby Brown over, because his dumb ass was talking on the cell phone. When the cops walked up to his window, the musky scent of a bar sink filled their nostrils and they pulled Bobby out for a breathalyzer test. Bobby blew over the legal limit and it was off to jail his ass went.
TMZ says that Bobby was taken to the jail in Van Nuys to pose for his (insert the number of times you rolled your eyes at this entire post and then you’ll have the number)th mug shot. Bobby’s “people” somehow got his bail money together by checking under sofa cushions and asking the other members of New Edition to give a FREE BOBBY!!! concert in the parking lot of a laundromat. Bobby bailed out at around 2:30 PST, just 2 hours after he was busted.
If charged, this will be Bobby’s second time at the DUI party. Bobby served 8 days in jail in 1996 after he pled guilty to a DUI in Georgia.
Reading shit like this mess makes me blow an air kiss to my daddy for walking out on our asses so I didn’t have to see him fuck up before
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It’s a day of the week that ends in Y, which means that it’s National No Jail For Lindsay Lohan Day, which means the judge obviously didn’t force her out of her house arrest resort today. LiLo got all dressed up and shuffled off to court only to be told by Judge Stephanie that she won’t be going to jail, because they shouldn’t have booze tested her in the first place. Citizens of L.A., stick your head outside of the window and inhale deeply because that’s musky scent of your tax dollars burning (which fittingly is also the same scent as LiLo’s skin).
TMZ reports that LiLo’s alcohol testing ended on February 25th and Judge Stephanie never ordered any additional testing. Judge Stephanie also told the Probation Department that they need to stop testing her for drugs and booze. YAY! LiLo can freely booze her face off, but Judge Stephanie did lay down a few rules:
1. No more parties!
2. Only one friend at a time (family members don’t count)
Judge Stephanie softly slapped LiLo on the wrist by saying that she showed poor judgement. Judge Stephanie then gave LiLo a dozen drink tickets for wasting her time.
This news definitely ruined my day, but it made LiLo’s! Hearing from a judge that she can suck a keg dry as long as only one friend is there to hold her weave back is
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