“Durrrrrrrrr….”
As even the psychic cat with the dusty turban on the Santa Monica Promenade predicted, Brad Pitt’s whole “I was a boring pile of stale weed shank during my marriage to Jennifer Aniston” shit scooted its ass along every damn tabloid cover this week and has once again pushed us down into the dark ages where we can’t even buy Astroglide and some pork rinds without their faces staring at us in the checkout line at KMart. Every time one of those bitch’s brings up each other’s name, a black cat breaks a mirror under a ladder and it’s another 30 years of bad luck for all of us! But let’s get into this shit anyway.
UsWeekly is saying that Jennifer Aniston stopped knitting the words Mrs. Theroux on her favorite ice cream tub cozy (Note: I can’t believe ice cream tub cozies exist) to briefly roll an eye at Brad and apparently her team of publicists demanded he fart out an “I’m Sowwy“ about that shit he said. Their source says, “They got his team involved and Brad was read the riot act — the only way you can read the riot act to Brad Pitt. No one believes his words were taken out of context — he said what he said. I do hear that
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