Let’s all take a moment of silence for all the feeling Mimi’s full-time, personal Photoshop artiste lost in his fingers after spending hours upon hours erasing all pixels of reality from her first American Idol promo picture to make this gloriously fraudulent masterpiece. Mimi’s Photoshopper used the hell out of the de-rib tool and pinched her waist so much that it looks like her intestines escaped up to her chichis area to keep from suffocating. Even that sun looks skinnier.
Everything about this is perfection from her HERP DERP hand poses to the sun setting in the background to the blurry puddle of Photoshop sloppiness in the water on the left. It’s as if the late Bob Ross and the late Thomas Kinkade joined artistic forces to paint a portrait of Mimi using only melted wax and lies.
via Wetpaint (Thanks, Lane)
Thomas Kinkade, the most prolific artist of this generation whose work was so coveted that most roadside motels had to nail it to the wall to keep people from stealing it, has walked toward the light he painted. Thomas Kinkade is now teaching a master class in art next to Bob Ross at the great big Learning Annex in heaven after he died of natural causes at the young age of 54 yesterday. A spokesperson for the Kinkade family tells the Associated Press that Thomas passed away at his home in Los Gatos, CA.
The self-described “warrior of light” is the most collected artist in the US and it’s been reported that 1 in 20 American homes has one of his cottage paintings hanging on its walls. It’s true. If you walked into any memaw’s home right now you’d find her crying pastel oil tears into a Kinkade handkerchief in between taking sips of orange tea from a Kinkade mug sitting on a Kinkade placemat. I mean, you really haven’t seen art world drama until you’ve seen two 75-year-olds fight over a Kinkade painting at the swap meet.
Thomas Kinkade was in the news two Decembers ago after he was busted for DUI. The Los Angeles Times also reported a while ago that Thomas Kinkade once drunkenly pissed on a Winnie the Pooh statue at the Disneyland Hotel in Anaheim. Dude was the painter of light AND the bad boy of the art world.
Rest in peace, Thomas. Your legacy will forever live on in this masterpiece Christmas movie starring Jensen Ackles the ho from Supernatural:
